You’re 3 months old.
There is a box in your closet filled with onesies you don’t fit in anymore. I tried to make them fit. To hold on to the Newborn status as long as I absolutely could. But your Lola reminded me how uncomfortable it is to wear clothes that are just a wee bit too snug. She’s right. They’ve been put away. Excuse me while I sob.
Outgrowing all of your newborn clothes wasn’t the only thing you did, though. This is the month you smiled. You had smiled before this month, of course, but I’m pretty sure those smiles were for your angels. And gaseous releases.
I remember it so clearly. Your dad and I were sitting on the same couch watching a Korean television show on Hulu. It was a lame attempt at “date night”. Sigh.
Anyways, you’re on my lap and I start clapping your hands together and you BUSTED out laughing. It wasn’t a loud smile. It wasn’t a giggle. It was a laugh. A genuine, my-mommy-is-the-funniest-person-on-the-planet laugh.
I don’t think I could be prouder than if you graduated college. Assuming college is still important by the time you’re 18.
For the next 15 minutes your dad and I forgot all about our Korean drama (spoiler alert: The main secret spy assassin dude DIES at the end. After he basically saves the entire world from North Korea and is about to propose to his secret spy girlfriend. HE DIES. Korean writers really need to learn what a happy ending is.) because we were absolutely smitten with your laugh and your smile and the new revelation that we can do something, aside from feeding you, that makes you happy.
Clapping isn’t the only thing that makes you laugh. So do kisses on those adorably large cheeks, hair sweeping across your face, and farts. Something tells me you’ll always be up for a good fart joke…
I pray this is a skill you keep practicing. Trust me. There will be days, weeks, maybe even months (heaven forbid), where you won’t want to smile, and like any skill you’re trying to develop, you do it anyways. Because no matter what your circumstances are a smile reminds you, and everyone around you, that God is good. He’s got this. Promise.