This weekend Mark and I had a pretty long fight. I wouldn’t say it was a ‘bad’ fight it just started to feel like it was never going to get resolved. I kept thinking I was saying what I wanted, and it felt like he kept ignoring me. And he thought he was hearing and doing everything right, and that I just refused to be happy.
By the end of the fight I realized that part of what I hated about fighting was that I never talked about our fights, the real ones, on the blog and this bothered me.
I feel fake when I read through some of the marriage posts and think, “Wow, Marie, you make marriage sound like a trip to Disney World where all you do is pick on each other and play with cats. What is with the front?”
Because some words I would never use to describe marriage include simple, easy, or ‘piece of cake’. Atleast not for my marriage. This marriage gig has been hard with a capital difficult at times. There is so much sacrifice, talking, conflict resolving, trust testing, more talking, and behaviors designed purely to annoy you.
I once read that marriage is like having a huge, beautiful tree growing in the middle of your living room. You love the tree and think it adds a certain something to your life, but there is no way to deny that it completely changes your life. Navigating throughout the house is no longer the same because of this tree, its needs and presence always have to be considered.
I love this marriage, my huge tree in the middle of the living room, and I’m never going to say it’s easy, but I hope to always say it is worth it.
What I’m trying to say is that we all know that marriage is hard, and the McKinney-Oates Cereal marriage is no different. Life is not just about Blogicals and dressing cats up like pilgrims and indians. Please don’t think I’m fake or trying to act like life and marriage doesn’t suck major sometimes. Sometimes they do. I’m just not big on blogging about it.
I don’t really know why I decided to write about this other than just wanting to ‘keep it real’. Yo. Peace out.