I am not going to lie. Any time a blogger predominantly writes about a relationship and then quits writing for what feels like forever I’m all, “Mark, I think such-and-such is having relationship problems.”
“Who is such-and-such?”
“This blogger that I read. She’s from Timbuktu. I don’t know her or anyone that knows her. But I read her blog because she writes about her fiance/spouse/any other kind of romantic partner.”
“You don’t know her? Yet, you read about her personal life?”
“She puts it out there.”
“And you don’t know her.”
“Why are you stuck on that minor detail. I think she’s going through a divorce/breakup.”
“I’m not sure what’s more disturbing. That you read a complete stranger’s blog or that you think I’d care.”
“All I’m saying is that I think something is up…”
Naturally, while I took my long blogging break I started to realize that there may be someone out there telling her boyfriend about this crazy married cat lady in Nashville that hadn’t blogged in over a week and maybe something was wrong. Maybe he finally got tired of her Obama-loving ways. Or maybe the stress of running a household, blog and making sure the cats were up and ready for the daily naps had broken her. Or maybe that last post was about how she was pregnant AND IT WASN’T HIS.
Well, person I don’t know with all your crazy dramatic fantasies, I can let you know that Mark and I are doing just fine.
What has kept me away from my blogging duties, you ask? A couple of things:
A) I have clients. Like lots of clients. Basically, I work all day then I spend most evenings therapizing and/or writing notes. Blogging on all fronts seemed to just slip to the bottom of my to-do list.
B) Let me just say something else about people who blog about their relationships. If you are putting your love life out there for my Google Reader pleasure and you’ve developed a readership and something happens and you guys break up/divorce, can you at least let me know what’s up? I understand keeping the gory details private, but this whole one day I’m married, the next day I’m not and I’m not so much as going to address it is kind of lame. I’m just saying…
C) Poop. Poop is the biggest reason I haven’t blogged in a long minute. It’s all I want to talk about. So I’m just going to put it out there…
My mom has always stressed the importance of having “good poop”. Her biggest concern whenever I travel is that I won’t poop because I’m scared like that. Not only do I have pooping fears, but my diet doesn’t make pooping the best most wonderful experience. Well, it’s finally clicked with me, with some help from the hubby, that I should be pooping more regularly. And it should be a better experience.
Enter Kroger-brand Raisin Bran. I start eating it everyday for breakfast and do you know that it has changed my entire life? My entire life. I’m regular and it feels amazing and I feel like a new woman. A new woman that wants to make sure everyone is pooping regularly because this poop? This poop can change your life. And I obviously don’t know if this beats childbirth, but I will say that it beats the following: graduating high school, college, and graduate school, most sex positions, chocolate cake, cheddar peppers, and Big Macs.
I’m hoping now that I got that off my chest I can continue my regular blogging schedule.
After a bathroom break, of course.