85%

Dear Marshmallow,

I didn’t think I would write open letters to you on my blog because I’m not very consistent. And I’d hate for this to be the only blog letter you get. Not that you care. You’ll probably be just like your dad and never read this anyways. Which is probably for the best considering I’m not afraid to talk about my bowel movements so why would I shy away from talking about yours?

The thing is that I just got an email that told me that if you decided to make your debut this week you would have an 85% chance of surviving. Obviously, I’m thrilled that your survival is slowly depending less on me and that we’re that much closer to meeting you. And holding you. And introducing you to your cats.

But that also means that our special journey is almost over. I mean, we’re literally about to “cut the cord” and you’re not going to need me the way you have for the past 6.5 months. Which is great, but kind of sad.

I can already tell I’m going to suck at dropping you off at kindergarten.

When I told your dad that you had an 85% chance of making it he looked surprised. And happy. I think he’s gearing up for your arrival. Mostly because he now gets to buy all the boy toys he wants.

And he thought he wanted a girl. Pssh.

Your brown grandmother is finding out that you have an 85% chance right now, as she reads this. I didn’t want to tell her because if she had her way you would have been here back in November when you didn’t have any chance at all because you were still… underdone? Anyways, now that she knows your odds are pretty good I wouldn’t be surprised if she starts praying for your early arrival. I’m just kidding. Your brown grandmother knows that 85% is a B, and she won’t settle for anything less than A’s. Especially when it comes to things like survival rates.

And this is as good a time as any to let you know that McKinney’s don’t make B’s. Unless you’re Bobby.

Which reminds me, please don’t play World of Warcraft. Please.

I think that’s it, my little almost finished Marshmallow. Keep up the good work.

Love,
Mom (<— THAT IS SO WEIRD!)

P.S. You’re going to love your cats. They’re great.

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4 thoughts on “85%

  1. Miranda Priest says:

    85%? Whoa, you are a mom. CA.RAZY.

    I think you will be amazed at how much Marshmellow needs you after his arrival. Like… for the next two years you will enjoy showers simply for the alone time kind of neediness, lol. But they are so much fun once they stop crapping their pants, lol.

    Warcraft: HA! Nice. I too will say a prayer for you on that one ; )

  2. Tami says:

    LOVE this!!!!!

  3. Secret Agent "CT" says:

    Aww Marie. This was a sweet post. It’s funny to me that you are a teeny bit sad your pregnancy will be over before you know it. I was on the complete opposite end of this. I would pray for early labor but that baby be okay. I also prayed that my doctor got my due date wrong and that I was WAY further along than she thought. Then when I did have to go to the hopital for early labor, I freaked out. I decided that night to let God be in control of the baby like he should be. When it was time for Macie’s arrival (on her actual due date), I freaked again. Thinking really? This labor crap is no joke. Maybe I could be pregnant for a few more days? Is puking mulitple times a day for the past 9 months really that bad? 🙂 lol

    Overall, I do not have fond memories of my pregnancy. It makes me a little sad and feel kind of quilty for feeling that way. I don’t regret the outcome but just didn’t enjoy it. It makes me happy that you have (and anyone else that has) enjoyed it. I think that’s how it is supposed to be.

    OH! PS. Last night on Letterman, Dr.Oz (who I now hate) said that it’s basically the woman’s fault if she has morning sickness during her pregnancy! He said it could be controlled through the mother’s diet. If she ate bland foods there wouldn’t be morning sickness. He is full of CRAP!!! I ate nothing, super bland foods, fried foods, sour foods, veggies, fruits, candy bars, you name it. Nothing helped!! I tried it all!

  4. Rebecca says:

    Heart. I hope you write many more letters.

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