It’s in his baby book

Otis: fart grunt fart fart grunt

Me: I think he’s pooping.

Mark: I’ll change it later.

Me: There were, like, 3 good releases. And he looks really happy right now. You’re going to need to change him pretty soon.

Mark: He’ll be fine.

Me: Ok, well, I’m off to work. Love you guys.

Mark: Love you.

Otis: fart

10 minutes later my cell phone rings.

Mark: Dude. You should have seen this diaper. He had to be holding on to 3 days of poop or something. I mean, it. was. filled.

Me: I told you he needed to be changed!

Mark: Seriously, this diaper was insane.

Me: Was it a blow out?

Mark: No, but, man, if I made one wrong move it would’ve been everywhere. Everywhere.

Me: Ha, well, I’ll see you tonight.

8 hours later. Eight.

Me: I’m home. Where’s my little Otis man?

Mark:  You need to see that diaper.

Me: What?

Mark: The diaper from this morning. It’s next to his changing table. You have got to see it.

Me: You saved the diaper? From this morning?

Mark: Yeah. It was that insane. Go look.

5 years later

Otis: Mommy, what’s that smell?

Me: That’s your baby book, Sweetie.

Mark: Seriously, O-man. That diaper was insane.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “It’s in his baby book

  1. Connie says:

    Remind me not to ask to see his baby book. You are both to funny!!!

  2. Marie – I have been a VERY bad blog reader and I’m just starting to catch up. First, congrats on the baby making.
    Second, this was fucking hysterical.
    Oh wait. Can i swear on your blog now that there’s a child involved?
    ♥ Louise

  3. […] Anyways, I was maybe, a little bit, kind of bracing myself for that. For not knowing anyone and being excluded. Except within minutes the table in front me asked if I wanted to sit with them. Of course, I said yes to the lovely ladies (Malia, Scarlet, and Busy Mom, I mean, Elizabeth). Because I had been eavesdropping eating bacon I knew that these ladies had real blogs. Like, I highly doubt any of them wrote about saving poopy diapers. […]

  4. […] diaper that your dad saved. The joy when I get home from work. The chiropractor bill that your dad and I will have because we […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: